The Second Laundromat Hang

March 11, 2010

C.O.D.Y. The Robot Who Hangs Out enters the laundromat and approaches an old lady who’s folding laundry.

C.O.D.Y.: Hey, do you know where the suitcase is?

OLD LADY: What? Whose suitcase?

C.O.D.Y.: My suitcase. I left it here last week.

OLD LADY: Why did you do that?

C.O.D.Y.: So I wouldn’t have to drag it to a cricket tourney.

OLD LADY: Cricket? I didn’t know there were cricket tourneys in Dayton. Where do you play?

C.O.D.Y.: Darryl’s dad’s basement. It’s a fun time, you should come hang.

OLD LADY: You play cricket in a basement?

C.O.D.Y.: Yeah, over in Trotwood. No big whoop.

OLD LADY: But you could break something, or get hurt.

C.O.D.Y.: You think so?

OLD LADY: Definitely.

C.O.D.Y.: Nah. It’s cool. Well, one time a dart bounced back and went through Darryl’s dad’s foot and Gary 2 had to sober up and drive him to Good Samaritan, but we haven’t broken anything.

OLD LADY: Gary 2? A dart? I thought you said cricket, the British sport with balls and bats.

C.O.D.Y.: No, I mean cricket, the cool sport with darts and beer.

OLD LADY: I see. Well, very good then.

C.O.D.Y.: So, hey. Is Sarah working?

OLD LADY: Yes, but she’s in the back room talking with her boyfriend.

C.O.D.Y.: Boyfriend? Drag.

OLD LADY: I could ask her about the suitcase, if you’d like.

C.O.D.Y.: No sweat. I’ll come back so I can get more face time with her, if you get my meaning.

OLD LADY: I do get your meaning, and I don’t like it. You’re a robot. You can’t flirt with humans.

C.O.D.Y.: Drag. Why not?

OLD LADY: Because humans should flirt with humans and robots should flirt with robots.

C.O.D.Y.: For real? Says who?

OLD LADY: Most people. There should be a law, really.

C.O.D.Y.: Drag.

The song “Dreams” by The Cranberries blasts from CODY’s speakers.

C.O.D.Y.: I play this when I’m bummed. Oh my life. Is changing everyday. In every possible way.

OLD LADY: Jesus H. I cannot believe the morons at Wright State let all these robots run wild. Turn that off.

C.O.D.Y.: I’m not running wild, man. I’m hanging out. With everyone I see. And if you think that’s a bad thing, then I don’t know what to tell ya.

Next: There’s No Reason Why You Can’t Put Guinness in My Bloody Mary

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