She Will Cost More Than I Thought She Would

March 11, 2010

Very bad news. The work I need to do on the bobber will cost four thousand dollars. I repeat: four thousand dollars. That’s about what I’ll take home from Perkins this summer. I have never been more bummed about anything before. Her electric wasn’t as amazing as Sarah’s dad told me. He also told me her kick start was good. Bo from Bo’s came over to check it out and he said the kick start is downright fucked and needs to be replaced. Her suspension is fine so at least I’ve got that. I’ve worked her with the bug and tar remover for, shit, a hundred hours now and she’s clean as new. I even set down a turkey sandwich on her swingarm and picked it up and kept eating it to prove to Sarah that she was clean enough to eat off of.

Now get this: Sarah’s mad at me yet again. She found the Oxy and Demerol in my dopp kit and was like, What is this? And I said, I don’t know, why were you looking in my dopp kit? And she was like, How do you not know about a Ziploc baggie full of pills in your dopp kit? Are you retarded? If one of us is a retard, she is. She loves the show “Wipeout” and I’m like, Sarah, it’s just folks falling down and getting wet, and they’re not even getting hurt that bad. Why do I have to watch it with you? Sarah is a hard woman and I often think about moving back to Columbus or getting back with Linda.

This dude I know from Perkins came over Sunday and drank beers and it was alright. Was nice to talk about something other than NCR. That’s all Sarah’s dad wants to talk about, and I want to say, Nobody gives a fuck, Rick. Nobody. Stop talking to me about NCR. I heard the guy who runs NCR is a dick from New York City and he never even lived here and then moved NCR to Atlanta, so fuck him. Rick says he had to move NCR to Atlanta, it’s business, and business is business. But what do you know about business? You’re a dentist. You poke around in folks’ mouths and tell kids to brush their teeth more often, and if you’re lucky you spot a cavity and you get to fill it. It’s not like what you do all day is much harder than flipping pancakes and grilling burgers at Perkins.

I would say all that but the bobber is technically still his and he can take it back whenever he wants.

Next: The Second Laundromat Hang

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